It’s clear that some Santa Claritans feel under seige these days, surrounded on all sides by people, animals, and things that threaten the Santa Claritan way of life, nay, even their existence in this place.
We’ve discussed the threat posed by developers at length recently, but now there are two other threats that have come to light that are keeping many Santa Claritans awake at night and making Awesometown, well, a little less Awesome.
Coyotes and Mexicans. And I’m not talking about the kind of coyotes that you usually think about in tandem with Mexicans (though they probably keep some SCVers up too) nor am I talking about Mexican coyotes as a species, I’m talking about the devious animal that stalks SCV pets.
In today’s Signal LTE section, Ms. Pam Polivka of Saugus laid out the threat in dramatic detail:
Santa Clarita’s reputation as a family friendly, peaceful city is being threatened by an out-of-control population of coyotes.
I recently lost a pet cat to two coyotes in my neighborhood near Saugus. A neighbor saw a coyote with my cat in its mouth and another coyote on the street in front of my house while she was walking her dog.
She was frightened for her own safety. As I was looking for my cat, I talked to neighbors who told me of losing multiple pets to coyotes. One even said he saw a coyote at the mall.
It’s time to reduce the population of these dangerous animals.
Ah yes! Naturally, if one person and a few of her neighbors harbor anxiety about coyote attacks, it necessarily follows that we as a community should adopt a policy of general, unrestrained coyote-cide.
I'm forming an anti-raccoon posse. Who's with me?
Naturally!
I for one think the coyote threat is way overblown and is a clever mask on the real problem facing Santa Claritans: raccoons. These animals, which look like criminals (indeed they are often pictured behind bars) and have creepy paws, are highly intelligent, covert, and employ team-based tactics, as evidenced by their recent assault on a family of ducks in my complex’s pool.
It’s highly probable in my estimation that it is teams of raccoons that are eating the SCV’s designer Cockapoos and Labradoodles, not coyotes.
The situation is so bad that I feel unsafe, terrorized even, in my home when I ponder the threat that raccoons pose to me and my family. Why are they coming after me? Why are they invading my peaceful suburban space? I moved here for the schoools, the Newhall Land brochures said nothing about raccoons!
Conclusion: we need to make the SCV raccoon free, by whatever means possible, with no expense spared, post haste.
But raccoons and coyotes are tiny threats compared to the real nemesis causing sweaty night terrors in California King sized beds all over town: Mexicans.
Check out this fellow from Newhall who, when asked to explain why he couldn’t find a job in Santa Clarita, blamed the Mexicans:
“Because there just aren’t any, the Mexicans took them all.” (page 108)
Nailed it! I can corroborate this man’s statement. Since Mexicans moved into Santa Clarita en masse, I have been unable to find work in the highly competitive and sought-after Day Laborer field. Indeed, it seems all white people have been squeezed out of this employment market, quite literally, because none of them stand on the sidewalk in front of AV Equipment Rental on Railroad Avenue.
And what about SCVJobs.com, the Signal’s classified section, Craiglist, self-initiative and an old fashioned can-do spirit? Don’t bother. The Mexicans got there first and there are literally no jobs left in the SCV for patriotic white Americans.
While the work situation and coyote-terrorists (or raccoon criminals) are distressing, what’s truly depressing and terrifying to Santa Claritans is that there are no places left for white people to shop. From the same opinion survey (completed Winter 2010!):
They put a Vallarta market in Valencia and it should have been in Newhall where the Hispanicresidents are. Very unhappy. (page 114)
Notwithstanding the fact that the “they” in this statement is the free market enterprise system touted by conservatives in this valley and not City Hall, this participant is correct to be scared and fearful of Vallarta in Valencia. After all, there are no Mexicans living in or visiting Valencia, it is 100% white.
Ergo, if a Mexican woman shops at Vallarta in Valencia, the Mexican population of Valencia is increased by one, which is one too many by my reckoning.
So, SCV, I understand you now. Traffic makes you really angry, but it is developers, coyotes and Mexicans that cause the real nail-biting and night terrors.
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